Super Pests


I just read that there is a strain of “super lice” spreading across the country and now I’m nervous around anyone who scratches their head. So, if you see me today, please don’t act inquisitively or deeply consider anything.

When I was a kid, my elementary school was obsessively preoccupied with lice prevention. Is that still a big concern? I guess not, since the lice have prevailed. Volunteer mothers (never a father, not once) would walk through rows of desks and run pencils through our hair, making sure there weren’t any disgusting creatures crawling around our scalps. We also got a lot of warnings about sharing hairbrushes with our friends.

Well, joke’s on you, lice—I haven’t brushed my hair since 1994.

Leave a comment. Just try it. It will be fun, I swear.