I Won’t Be Clementine

EvilScientists

I found something new to add to the list of things about which we all need to worry. A group of Japanese researchers have discovered how to implant fake memories into peoples’ brains. They can change the way a person interacts with and remembers the world. The scientists are hoping to use this discovery to treat cognitive disorders, like depression or autism. They think they’ll be able to use visual distortions to erase terrible memories and insert wonderful ones into peoples’ minds. Once a suffering person’s brain-wires are all soldered in new directions, the person will, presumably, be happy and well-functioning.

That’s all well and good, but it’s like these people have never seen a sci-fi movie in their lives. Don’t they know that powers like this can be harnessed for good and evil? And they’re always harnessed for evil? At least at first, before evil-users are usurped by good-doers.

There are definitely memories I could stand to live without. I’d be happy to get rid of a few traumatic moments that continue to pop up in my brain at really inopportune times. I’d love to be without some embarrassing middle school moments. But I’m not going to mess with that kind of mind-melding sorcery. I don’t need to walk away from an outpatient procedure thinking I can fly on an invisible dragon or juggle rings of fire with my eyes closed. That’s exactly the kind of thing my enemies want me to think.

 

Leave a comment. Just try it. It will be fun, I swear.